[余興用] 英文の添削をお願い致します。 -スターウォーズのイントロ風の映-

[余興用] 英文の添削修正のお願い

[余興用] 英文の添削修正のお願い前回、英文の添削をお願いし、cbm51901様に仕上げていただきました。ありがとうございました。 http://okwave.jp/qa/q8803939.html?from=history その後、余興用の撮影などを行ううち、ストーリーを変更せざるを得ない状況となり下記のように文章を変更いたしました。きれいな文に仕上げていただき大変申し訳ないのですが、再度文章の添削をお願いできないでしょうか。どうぞよろしくお願い致します。 ------------------------------------------ 皆様、本日はご来場いただき、誠にありがとうございます。エピソード1『みかんが繋ぐ愛』タロウは海の民。生まれ育った横浜の街を誰よりも愛している。友達にも仕事にも恵まれ、充実した毎日を送っていた。ハナコは山の民。大都会東京で、故郷静岡のみかんを売って生活していた。商売が軌道に乗ったマユミは、恵比寿にオフィスを構え、みかんの販路拡大を狙っていた。これは、海で育った男と山で育った女との、美しい愛の物語である... (ちなみにフィクションである...) ------------------------------------------ ↓↓ ------------------------------------------ Everyone, today received your visit, Thank you very much. Episode 1 "Love, which connected by orange" Taro belongs to the sea. More than anyone, he loves Yokohama city where he was born and raised. He was blessed to also work to friends, sent every day to fulfilling. Hanako is from the mountains. In the big city, Tokyo, she had been making a living by selling oranges from Shizuoka, her hometown. As Hanako's business got on track, She has offices in Ebisu,and aimed at expanding sales channels of oranges. This is an enchanting tale of love between two people: A woman who grew up in the mountains, and a man who grew up in the sea. (Incidentally, this is a fiction ...) ------------------------------------------

[余興用] 英文の添削をお願い致します。

[余興用] 英文の添削をお願い致します。友人の結婚式で余興を行う際、スターウォーズのイントロ風の映像で英文を流そうと思っています。翻訳サイトを使って翻訳→自分で明らかにおかしいなという箇所は修正したのですが、まだ自信がありません。日本語の字幕も出しますので、英文はあまり読まれないかもしれませんが、明らかに間違っている文章を流すのも抵抗があり…。英語が得意な方に添削をお願いできればと思います。どうぞよろしくお願い致します。 ■■■元の文章■■■ エピソード33 余興に懸けた男結婚式の余興にすべてを捧げた男がいた。男の名は、山田太郎。彼はその白い歯を光らせ、こう語る。「結婚式に出て余興をやらないなんて、うなぎの入ってないうなぎパイのようなものさ!」彼はいつも僕らの余興リーダーだった。企画・折衝・衣装の手配・映像編集… 率先して大変な作業を引き受け、僕らの結婚式を盛り上げてくれた。いま、僕らは太郎に、最高の余興でお返しをしたいと思う。でも…その前に… 太郎の素晴らしい余興を、会場の皆様にもご覧いただきたい。 …ちょっとだけだから、許してね …花子さんも…許してね ■■■仮翻訳した文章■■■ Episode XXXIII THE ENTERTAINMENT MAN（←タイトル部はあまり字数を増やしたくないので、雰囲気が通じればよいと考えています。） There was a man who devoted all to wedding entertainment. His name, Taro Yamada. With his white teeth shining, he says "I don't do a sideshow in wedding ceremony, the thing like that doesn't contain eel Unagi-pie!" He was always our leader . Planning, negotiation, arrange for costumes, video editing. . . He underwrote the hard work and initiative, to pile up our wedding. Now, we want to return the best to Taro in entertainment. But before that... We want to show the Taro's entertainment to also the people of venue. …Because a little bit, forgive us… Hanako…Please forgive...

英文添削をお願いします。

英語の再勉強中です。英文を作成しましたので添削をお願いします。 There was also an affair today. Of course, that result was our big boss. After our boss reported his work to him, he took a joke, ‘the man who gave me this info told me that this is so expensive.’ This word aroused him and yelled. Then he himself called on the man who said it and clamed about it like child in the presence of us. It was really unbelievable scene. There is a problem wherever he is.

英文の添削をお願いします。

英文の添削をお願いします。和訳にあわせて英文を作ったのですが、おかしいところがあれば訂正と解説をお願いします。 Kameido has beenprospered to erected the amusement at Edo era. （亀戸は江戸時代に遊郭ができたときから栄えてきた） He is decide to kill the people randamly. （彼はでたらめに殺す順番を決めている） renewal of rental every two year. （2年毎の家賃の更新） The convenience of Minami-Senjyu is locat on inconbenient location. （南千住のコンビニは不便な場所に位置している） I embarked on a new adventure , and overthrowed the our boart. （僕は新しい冒険に乗り出し、船を転覆させた） She works in store who i had meet her is revealed. （僕が前にあったことのある彼女の店は摘発を受けた） she sinking a song is a new song. （彼女が歌っている曲は新曲だ）

英文を書いてみたのですが添削してもらえないでしょうか

The Green Mile This movie was released in 1996, and it was nominated for four Academy Award. (Best Supporting Actor, Best Picture, Best Sound, and Best Adapted Screenplay ) The title means road to the electric chair. The scene of this story is on death row in the 1930. 1930 year was an age of serious great depression in the United States. One day, a new inmate arrives. His name is John Coffey who is 7-foot-tall , and black male. He convicted of raping and killing two young Girls. At first sight, John Coffey seems very ferocious, but actual John is gentle giant. Sometimes he cries, because he afraid of darkness. Surely most audience think he is not man who can murder young girls. However he was found by police holding corpse. In fact he has extraordinary healing powers, who reveals by healing warder’s urinary tract infection and resurrecting a mouse. When John is asked to explain his power, he merely says that he "took it back. On that day John defy to care girls. John is innocence. Regrettably, John was sentenced to death, so he can’t escape to death penalty. The director have much concern with John’s initial. John’s initial is the same Jesus Christ. John was modeled on god. He tried to save the human, but he was killed by human. His life resembles Jesus Christ. He had said I was tired before it died. Perhaps god thought so too. 　This film picks up the problem of race, and false accusation. John’s lawyer conceive a prejudice against black man. The lawyer thought Black man is the same as dog. He said even if it is usually obedient, that might bite us suddenly. This idea was general in 1930. It is not an exaggeration to say that discrimination to the black executed John. In the last scene, a hero says everyone walks in a green mile of the life. He was 108 years old now, but there is no person who lives a long life in this age. He was helped his sick by John, but he couldn’t save John from electric chair. He probably received John’s life when he was helped. But he thinks his long life is visitation. The prisoner wants to live more, but warder who enforces the death sentence hopes for the death. It is the sarcastic one. 映画「グリーンマイル」についての文です。わからないところはエキサイト翻訳を使ったので、変なところがあると思います・・・。でも自分ではそれが変なのかわからなくて困っています。添削お願いします！

英文の添削をお願いします。

下記の英文の添削をお願い致します。 When I got up in the morning,I felt srtange atomoshere. I noticed my oclock aram did not go off.I had to go now. but I wanted to have a breakfast.I asked by myself what sholud I do. I made a decition I have a breakfast puickly. If I skip a breakfast,I feel bad and somthing happen during a class. so I think my decition was correct. As a result,I could get to the school on time. Morning class I studied about a fairlytale especially little red riding hood . the fairytale is called AKAZUKINTOOOKAMI in Japan. first,I talked about the import of this story in own country. Among stories is a little different. Second,We listened to another story on youtube I tell you about the story of summary. When The wolf hanged on in forest,he finded one house which a grandmather live.He is hugrry so he tyied to eat her.He came into her house and eat her up!He knew a liitle girl is coming.He waited for her in the house. A littl girl came into the house and met him.She did not realized he is wolf.she said,What great big eyes you have.He replied,All the better to see you with. but she came up with idea he has cool fury so I want the fury. she has guns and shout him.He was dead. She made a fury coat out of wolf slkin. She said,Hell,and do please note my lovely furry coat. I finished made up a story. but I worked with classmate that she ignored to me. I could not stand over again but I can not be helped. I think I am the worst level in this class.I can not speak English very well. Evening class We talked about heart. I think It is difficult to explain heart.It is depend on person. but We couled talk about having heart ot heart. After school I went to the Oxford Circe which is famous for shopping road. I bought some underwear which is Small size and a T-shirts, I was filld up satisfaction. At dinner My host mother told me about a tommorow's dinner. A familly is going to come home at dinner time and have a dinner with us. I feel complax and better at the same time. I can talk person who is diffrent usual but I do not have confedence. I think I lose my confidence tomorrow.

添削してください

If Momoe really minds grow, she should try to help or apologize to the driver. Although she was in a hurry, I thought she was able to riding a motorcycle while saying "I am sorry". It certainly seems that to met Himiko led change for Momoe. However, I felt that she was not change the emotions and responses for those who are not interested. もしモモコが本当に成長したのなら、彼女は運転手を助けようとしたり謝ったりするはずだ。いくら急いでいるとはいえ、「ごめんなさい」と言いながらバイクに乗り走り去ることくらいできたと思う。確かにモモコはイチゴと出会って変わったと思う。しかし、彼女が興味のない他者に対しての感情、対応は変わっていないと思った。こちらの英文を添削してください。よろしくお願いします。

英文添削おねがいします。

自分が今の仕事を選んだ理由を英文で書きました。添削よろしくお願いします。 I was working as a guide helper when I was a university student. I chose the work related with the person with autisms because of that. I was mental disabilities person's guide helper. However, there were person with autisms in that, too. I had gone out to various places with them on the weekend. But there were a lot of people who have taken a turn in the park during a day. And some people went to the same place every time. When I went out with the person, who lives in group home, She said "I don’t know why I am here, and I want to go home.” And she cried. At that time, I was working as a part-time job. Therefore, I did not neatly know their detailed situations. But I doubted that "Is their life good as today?" in many times. Of course, there were a lot of happiness and goodness, too. However, doubted things very strongly impression in me. So I thought that I want to help the individuals diagnosed with autism to be able to spend the full life happier than now. Therefore, I have chosen the current job that was able to be more deeply related with the person with autism.

英文（長文）の添削お願いします。

Santa Claus of The World Do you know a legendary character who is said to deliver presents for children at Christmas, called Santa Claus? Santa Claus is popular among children. A model of Santa Claus is a person called St.Nicolaus. As he was a pious Christian, he gave money to poor persons and helped persons in difficulties. Santa Claus we know today was originated from such a spirit. By the way, do you know that there are various Santa Claus in the world? First, I explain American Santa Claus. The characteristic of American Santa Claus, pump and cheerful, grow a while mustache, wrap the body in red and white hat and clothes with a black belt. He gets on the sled pulled by reindeers and enters a home from a stovepipe. Japanese Santa Clause thought almost same as that in America. In Australia, because this time is summer, Santa Claus wear in the short-sleeved shorts of these clothes. And a sled is pulled by kangaroos instead of reindeers. Next, I easily explain other Santa Claus. Russian Santa Claus is called Moroz. Surprisingly, once he was a bad magician who took away children and held him to presents. However, as time passed, he reformed himself and he came to distribute presents to make up for his bad behave. Spanish Santa Claus is called Befana. She is a cheerful old witch, full of curiosity for age and has been work for long time to make pleasant toys. In addition, there are some Santa Claus who varies in an appearance and character. There are Santa Claus of children, too. Why don’t you check about them who makes many people happy? 文やまとめ方が変な場合は指摘をおねがいします。言い換えた方がいいところも。構成的に1.これから書く文の導入、２．アメリカとそれに似ているサンタについて、3.その他のサンタについて、4.まとめにしてあります。まとめは何かけばいいか思いつかなかったのでまとまっていないと思います（汗

添削してください

He is a person who is wearing a simple shirt bought at AEON, and is engaged in a boring business called greengrocer. Through this story, if Momoe go to reach out to others like a man who sells vegitables, we can say she mature. 「イオンで買ったシンプルなシャツを着て、八百屋といういわば地味な商売を営んでいる人物だ。この物語を通して、モモエが彼らのような他者に手を伸ばすようになったのであれば、彼女は「成長」したと言えるだろう。」こちらの英文を添削して欲しいです。よろしくお願いします。

高校・不定詞の英文

お願い致します。英作文で次の２のほうが間違いだそうです。その理由を詳しく教えてください。スタジアムはその試合を見に来た人々で混雑していた。 1.The stadium was crowded with people who came to see the game. 2.The stadium was crowded with people to see the game. 彼は遅れないように急いだ。 1.He hurried in order not to be late. 2.He hurried not to be late. 日本語に訳すとどちらも　いいように思うんですが？？

英文の添削をお願いします。よろしくお願いします。

Unfortunately,I was robbed of my pleasure recently. I had my favorite view that was precious thing to me. The view is the sea that was able to see from the road in front of my house. I arrived at my house while always seeing the sea in the front. But a new house is built there pretty soon. I'm sure they will be enjoy the view and I'll be worry about scenery disappear little by little. 残念なことに私の楽しみが奪われました。私には大切な景色があります。その景色は私の家の前の道から見える海です。私はいつも正面に海を見ながら家に辿り着きます。しかし、まもなくそこには家が建ちます。きっと彼らはその景色を楽しむでしょう、そして私は少しずつ消えていく風景に悩まされるでしょう。

この英文添削をお願いします。

以下の私の英文チェックをお願いできますか？（１）だからこそ父の言葉は彼女の胸に響いた。 That's why her father's words have touched her heart. （２）父は自らそれを止めたと思っているだろうが、もともと彼女にはそれをしようという気持ちはなかった。彼は彼女の気持ちがわからなかったのだろうか？父は娘のことをわかっているようで、でもまだ彼女がどういう人物なのかわかっていなかったのかもしれない。 Her father thought he stopped it but that not true. She was not going to do it. Didn't he know how she felt? He believed that he knew his daughter very well and he thought he knew what kind of person she is, but actually not. （３）それでも彼女の父に対する感謝の気持ちは残っている。 Even if, her feeling of gratitude to her father is still remaining. （４）しかし彼女の混乱した気持ちを整理するには時間が必要だった。 However, she did have to take a time to comoise (?) her thoughts. すみませんがよろしくお願いいたします。

英文添削をお願いします！

英文添削をお願いします！ 1,どこが笑うとこなのか、わからなかったー！ I could not see where THE funny part was. 2,彼は気分屋だから、皆が悩まされている。 He is so moody that it annoys people around him. 3,私のしている仕事は融通が利く方だと思う。（出勤日、時間）I think that my workplace is kind of flexible.

英文の添削をお願いします。よろしくお願いします。

Unfortunately,I was robbed of my pleasure recently. I had my favorite view that was precious thing to me. The view is the sea that was able to see from the road in front of my house. I arrived at my house while always seeing the sea in the front. But a new house is built there pretty soon. I'm sure they will be enjoy the view every day and I'll be worry about scenery disappear little by little. 残念なことに私の楽しみが奪われました。私には大切な景色があります。その景色は私の家の前の道から見える海です。私はいつも正面に海を見ながら家に辿り着きます。しかし、まもなくそこには家が建ちます。きっと彼らはその景色を毎日楽しむ事でしょう、そして私は少しずつ消えていく風景に悩まされるでしょう。

英文の添削をお願いします

日本語にあわせて英文を作ったのですが、添削をお願いしたいです。１．彼のズボンの膝が汚れているということは、仕事してきたということを意味している When his knees is stained , he denotes that he has been job. ２．彼は毎日父親に野球を教えられ、今ではすっかり野球少年になって、毎晩自分で練習するようになった。 He willing to training in his mind every evening by becoming a baseball boy after he was trained the baseball by his father every day. その他 was + ～ing と、 had + ～ing では、どんな違いがあるんでしょうか？

英文を添削してください

Since the United States was born, people have guns and are allowed to hold it. Individuals people in the United States stood up with guns and fought against those who tried to make it a colony. In the disorder of the West Pioneering era, people fought with outlaws with guns. アメリカは個人個人が銃を持って立ち上がり、アメリカを植民地にしようとする者達と戦ってきた。また西部開拓時代の無秩序の中で、人々が銃を持って無法者たちと戦ってきたという事実がある。こちらの英文を添削して欲しいです。西部開拓時代や無法者とか少しわかりにくい言葉がありますが、日本語をそのまま英文にしたいというわけではなく、言いたいことが伝われば大丈夫です。ですので、日本語を変えていただいても大丈夫です。よろしくお願いします。

英文添削をお願いいたします。

アンディー・フグはスイスに１９６４年生まれ、彼はK－１の人気に貢献し、スポーツの歴史の中で尊敬される人物の中の一人です。彼は踵落としで伝説的であり、踵落としで世界でたくさんの勝利をおさめた。彼のリング上のハードな戦い方とは対照的に、彼は謙虚で、誠実で、やさしく、人々を積極的に助け、正義という感覚を兼ね備えていた。彼の性格は生涯を通して、多くの人を感動させて、２０００年の８月２４日に突然急性白血病で死んだ。この運命は敵と多くのファンにとって受け入れるのが困難だった。 Andy Hug was born in Switzerland in 1964. He contributed to K-1’s popularity and is still one of the most respected figures in sports history. He was legendary for axe kick and gained numerous victories with it in the world. In contrast to his hard fighting in the ring, he was modest, honest, gentle, helped people willingly and had the sense of justice. His nature inspired millions of people though life. But on the 24th of August 2000, he died unexpectedly as a result of leukemia. It was too difficult for opponents and thousands of fans to accept this fate. よろしくお願いします。

英文の拙訳の添削をお願いします。

While it may well be the case that these investors in S&P 500 index funds would be happy to have the benefit of this discretionary portfolio management at a relatively low price, this does not change the fact that investors are getting something different from what is being described to them. The argument that there is no problem here because investors are obtaining very cheap management is analogous to telling a customer who was handed a television that it’s not a problem that she was not given the toaster she was promised because the deal represents a bargain on televisions. 以上の英文の下記の拙訳の特に，The argument that there is no problem here because investors are obtaining very cheap management is analogous to telling a customer who was handed a television that it’s not a problem that she was not given the toaster she was promised because the deal represents a bargain on televisions.の直喩に特に焦点を当てて，添削願います。「S&P 500インデックスに資金を投じるこうした投資家が比較的低価格で自由裁量的ポートフォリオ運用の便益を喜んで受けるケースもよく分かるが，他方，彼ら投資家が彼らに目論見書で書いたのとは何処か違う状況に置かれることになるという事実をこれは変えるものではない。投資家は非常に安価な運用に与ることになるから何の問題もないという議論は，取引は，(元々)テレビを受取るのをあてにしたものでないことを表すから，彼女が約束されたトースターを与えられないということは(何ら)問題ではないということを，テレビを与った顧客に告げるのに類似している。」以上宜しくお願いします。

私の書いた英文の添削をお願いします。(2)

今、海外のペンパルと文通していのですが、自身がないのでこの英文が合っているかどうか教えてください。間違いがあったら正しい英文を教えてください。それと翻訳機では、通じなかったので今回は、翻訳機を使用せず、辞書で調べて書きました。 I happy that you like Mozart, too. I didn’t know that he lived in Prague. He is wonderful because he wrote 650 pieces. Could you tell me your favorite his pieces? My favorite his its is Eine Kleine Nachatmusik. You said me,”I was Wien when I was child. How was stay in Wien? As you know, I was stay in Wien on 2days. I’d like to stay more here. Could you tell me popular Czech fashions? Popular Japanese fashions are following pictures. Popular fashon is Camisole. あなたもモーツアルトが好きで嬉しいです。彼がプラハに住んでいることは、知りませんでした。彼は、６５０曲、作曲したので凄いです！あなたは、彼の曲で何が一番好きですか？私は、Eine Kleine Nachatmusikが好きです。あなたは、子供の時、ウィーンにいたんですね。どのくらいウィーンに滞在していましたか？ご存知のように私は、ウィーンに２日滞在しました。もう少し、ウィーンに滞在したかったです。話は、変わるのですが、チェコでは、どんなファッションが人気あります。日本では、下記の写真のファッションが人気があります。キャミソールを着たファッションが人気です。