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"Nonsense," I told her. " He's a fine, happy boy and you know it."
"But she is an expert in child care," Carolyn protested. "She must know."
"Even experts can be wrong," I said. I told her of an incident that had happened to an editor I know. One cold morning a warning light in her car came on. She quickly stopped at a service station. "Don't worry about it," the mechanic who checked her car told her. "The light will go off as soon as the car gets warmed up." She knew the car, and knew the warning light had never lit up on any other cold morning——but the expert had said it was OK, so she drove on.
It turned out that the radiator was frozen; she almost ruined the car. "I learned my lesson," she told me. "I should have paid attention to my own sense of the situation instead of listening to someone who was supposed to know."
"And that's what you're doing with your son," I said to Carolyn.
I was scolding her, but I was sympathetic too. The world has become so complicated that we're no longer sure of our ability to understand and deal with it. But common sense is as useful now as it ever was. No amount of expert knowledge can take the place of an intimate understanding of a person or a situation. At times you just have to trust your own judgment.
It almost cost me my life to learn that. I was reading a book one day, scratching the back of my head, When I noticed that, in one particular spot, the scratching echoed inside my head. I rushed off to my doctor.
"So think you've got a hole in your head?" He joked. "It's nothing——just a nerve."
Two years later, and after seeing four doctors, I was still being told it was nothing. To the fifth doctor, I said almost in despair, "But I live in this body. I know something's different."
"If you don't believe me, I'll take an X-ray and prove it to you," he said.
Well, there it was, of course, a tumor as big as a golf ball. After the operation, a doctor stopped by my bed. "It's a good thing you're so smart," he said. "Most patients die of these tumors because we don't know they're there until it is too late."
I'm really not so smart. I believe experts too easily. I shouldn't have listened to those first four doctors. It's hard to question opinions given with absolute certainty. Experts always sound so sure of themselves .
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