• 締切済み

アドバイス欲しいです! (この話は別の話の続きです

As I was rushing through the forest to return, a straggler from the bandit came up to me and said, "Give me your golds!! ALL OF THE ITEMS!” If I put this bandit in my team. After thinking a bit, I decided to ask to join me on my quest. It was the best way. It’s easy to win the fight. But I do need more people to beat Promon the Desecrator. “I’ll pay 100 gold if you help me in my quest. If you work normally, you only get 10 silver coins a day. 100 gold is 10000 times more than that. How is it?” He agreed to join our quest. I felt confident with having a bandit in our quest. Aiming for the castle and advancing steadily, we found a blue dragon that was 1000000 times bigger than us on top of the castle. The blue dragon destroyed the castle's roof because of his weight and with the ice, it destroyed houses that were around the castle. We luckily passed the dragon without having noticed. We are back at the castle. I started searching for Promon the Desecrator. Searching for a long time but came up empty. We decided to go back but I suddenly heard a barking voice. It was Lord Baylor’s pet dog. We followed the dog and ended up coming to the laboratory. I knew why the dog was barking at us. They needed help. Having an explanation, we had to find three more ingredients that will save his castle. The first ingredient was a poisoned leaf, the second ingredient was a poisoned mushroom, and the last ingredient was a special feather. We separated the team and went to the jungle forest to find a poisoned leaf and mushroom. For the special feather, I had to go to a room where they keep the bird with special feathers. When I came back from the room with the special feather, I was tattered from attacking the bird. Lord Baylor started making the potion to save the castle. The potion had all kinds of smells in the world, from pungent smells to good smells to foul smells to tree smells to soli smells. With holding the potion we run like a tiger to the watchtower. Lord Baylor is on one side that’s far apart from the dragon, where it’s safe. We were at the closest watchtower to beat the dragon. A fight started with my sign. Shooting arrows at the dragon's eye to divert attention. When the bandit was shooting, I was hiding behind the rock to wait for a chance to put this potion in the dragon’s mouth. A chance came. I stand up. Putting potion in the mouth. The dragon stopped moving and fell with a magnificent sound. We defeat the dragon. This is not the end of the fight. We still needed to fight with Promon the Desecrator. Going to the courtyard for the battle. After a furious battle, we finally defeated him. Everyone was covered in wounds, bleeding, and felt like they would die with one more punch. Bandit stood up and walked like a baby. With the weapon that he had, he crushed the head of Promon the Desecrator. It was a mess without a trace. While this evil necromancer is dead, there will be others who want to use the chalice’s power. We decided to destroy the chalice for peace. There was a tiny bag near his dead body. We picked it up and opened it. There was a chalice and other glittering things. They were hurting my eyes with the glittering lights. We were given a box from the Priest of Ancient Lore. We opened the box and there was a different spatial dimension. Don’t know where it is connected, but it looked like a place we never see on this planet. We threw away the chalice in that box. The chalice was gone somewhere we don’t know. This planet is safe now. Shattering the dragon, causing a blizzard in the courtyard. I couldn’t see even 10 cm in front of me. I was freezing and I heard the sounds of people falling. Luckily I was wearing chunky clothes but still, I was cold as the night dews of the world. I kept walking in the blizzard. Until I see the end of the courtyard. I didn't know which way I was going. Something just hit me. It was a castle wall. Going into the castle, Lord Baylor was waiting and praying that the blizzard woul

みんなの回答

  • ji1ij
  • ベストアンサー率26% (466/1738)
回答No.1

どんなアドバイスが必要ですか?

toakun2222
質問者

補足

文法、言葉使い、あとは間違っているところなどですね

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